'But what can I say? He has spoken to me, and he himself has done this. I will walk humbly all my years because of this anguish of my soul' (Isaiah 38: 15). So speaks King Hezekiah after recovering from a near fatal illness over 2,500 years ago, and it seems Jane Grayshon's experience has been much the same. Following a ruptured appendix, she has since suffered repeated bouts of near fatal peritonitis, requiring numerous surgical interventions and several spells in ITU. She is a committed Christian, and like Hezekiah has had to face the truth that faith does not mean God will protect us from times of difficulty and pain. Often we speak of suffering as God's megaphone alerting unbelievers to his existence and their need of him. This book shows God using it to bring Christians to greater maturity, understanding and dependence on him.

Like Hezekiah, Jane can report that God 'has spoken to me' through experiences. Through poems, vivid descriptions of objects such as Epstein's sculpture of Jacob wrestling with the angel, and details from stories, she endeavours to share some of her insights. Being stripped of her independence by life-threatening illness left her with no option but to depend completely on God, clinging desperately to the truths that God is good, sovereign, and completely in control, even when circumstances would seem to scream the contrary. This has taught her to 'walk humbly' before the Lord, but she makes no attempts to glamorise the 'grim darkness' of her journey.

If you want something rigorous and scholarly on suffering, this is not the book for you. Nor would I recommend it to anyone unsure of the biblical truths of God's goodness and sovereignty, as Jane assumes belief in these. However, it does contain 'treasures' of illumination, both for Christians confronting suffering and for those who wish to avoid giving them glib answers.

Reviewed by
Gill Matthews
(is a nurse and was a Cornhill Training Student at the time of writing this review)