I like to think I've always had an eye for a bargain, so naturally I was excited to come across the three-for-one Trinity, 'The best a man can get. Choose Godhead three-in-one for a closer save'.
However, early this month I placed an order for healing (X-Large) and a multipack of happiness and wellbeing, but they've not been delivered yet. This is despite me using 'In Jesus name' before Amen at checkout for guaranteed special delivery. I must confess that I wouldn't call myself a loyal customer, I use 'prayer' from time to time. But quite honestly, I've been disappointed with the results despite Pete@TheRockHardDisciple and Paul@Epistle.Fo.Shizzle 's customer 5* ratings. I had hoped that this simple transaction would be a smooth process. Can I remind you that the customer is always right?
Please let me know if there's just been a delay on my order, or if I need to place it again with a louder voice maybe? I saw that you don't take Amex, but do you still take animal sacrifices? Unfortunately, I am vegan, but I'm sure I've got half an aubergine and a Taste the Difference medley of Mediterranean vegetables in the bottom of my fridge. I would be happy to chuck them on the barbeque for you, if it gets the job done.
I would say that I'm looking forward to hearing from you soon, but that might imply that I'm in the mood for listening, and I'm really not. I'm far too busy. Frankly, all I want is results and I'm tired of waiting.
Mostly yours,
Christian Whingebag
